Review: Thor 8GB USB Stick
Thor’s your favourite super hero, right?
Of course not, the only factors that make Thor better than other heroes are the fact he’s a god and Chris Hemsworth.
Aesthetically, the model looks fine at a distance, the right palette colour for the Norse god, but when you look closer at the face (don’t call me racist), it looks kind of like the stereotypical pictures of Jesus, with the long brown hair and the brown stubble moustache beard thingy. The eyes are a bit too wide, leaving too much white showing and not enough colours in the irises. It’s a tad creepy, like that Bat Child photo (Google it internet troglodytes). The armour and cape look nice enough, but remind me a lot of the sort of Warhammer figures I used to paint, that look good enough but I wouldn’t be incredibly proud of it, and definitely wouldn’t sell it on.
Also, it confuses me how these are aimed at kids, since they were advertised in the side of The Entertainer. Most kids who go to The Entertainer shouldn’t have seen The Avengers, giving its 12A rating (Still confuses me when I see kids in nursery with Captain America bags) and I never would have wanted a USB stick at that age. It also doesn’t appeal to the PC gaming comic obsessive like myself and the members of the chat room I was on when I semi-interviewed them on their opinions of the stick. It’s only 8GB, and for a tenner, that isn’t that great.
It also isn’t great as a USB stick, it took me a good few minutes (with the help of MarshMallo) to find out how unlock the stick from the base. It has a strange amount of friction or something stopping it from easily coming out, which is good and bad. It also doesn’t fit in my laptop, which has three different USB ports in three different places. One makes it face towards my signed Binding Of Isaac poster; another places it upside down so it can’t actually fit if I leave the laptop on my desk and the others in permanent use.
So when I took it into school to see if it actually works, I was incredibly disappointed that it doesn’t work their either, since the computers are placed on their sides, the USB just floats in mid-air at eye-level, which teachers really don’t approve of. So, when I finally managed to get it work, it took a good five minutes to get recognised on three different separate systems (that’s bad), though data transfers were a good ten seconds faster than a few other memory sticks I’ve used before (that’s good). Some of these files would occasionally get corrupted during this transfer (that’s bad), but it did manage to hold System Shock Portable longer than a Kindle (that’s good). Kudos to anyone who gets the reference I just made. I know somebody out there will.
USB sticks are meant to be small portable plastic things that can carry plenty of computer information and can be kept in your back pocket. The Thor USB is none of these. It’s ungainly, doesn’t carry much information for the price and doesn’t even look good when plugged in. It also doesn’t stay together very well, seeing as how the hammer had already broken from the USB before I’d even left the shady back alley deal known as the Sprout Editorial Group.
Only buy this if you really love Jesus/Thor and think that Yahtzee Crosshaw’s opinions are always wrong. As JonTron once said, “Dishwasher, Yes!”
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