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Aunty Sprout: Friend With Depression

Posted by Aunty Sprout from Cardiff - Published on 16/06/2014 at 12:29
7 comments » - Tagged as Health, People

  • Aunty Sprout

Hi Aunty Sprout, 

I have a problem because a person in my life suffers from depression and now is self-harming.

I wish that I could do something but I don't know what to do about this.

Whenever I try and talk to her in group chats she puts on a smile and I would like to be able to make her smile because she is happy.

Aunty Sprout, do you think that you could help me to get my friend out of depression?

If you could I would be very grateful,


Well now Sprouters, it’s over to you! If you have any advice to offer, please leave your comments below.

Or if you have a problem or question that you would like some advice on, why not share it with TheSprout community? TheSprout has teamed up with Meic (the national helpline for young people), so they'll be offering their advice too.

So if you have a question that you'd like to ask, just submit it like you would an article via the submit news section with my name (Aunty Sprout) in the title or simply leave a comment on my homepage. Your entry will be posted anonymously, as I’ll change the name on it. Also remember to have a look at the info section. You can of course always contact Meic directly - www.meiccymru.org

7 CommentsPost a comment

Aunty Sprout

Aunty Sprout

Commented 23 months ago - 16th June 2014 - 12:30pm

Thank you for sharing and good for you for wanting to help your friend, make sure they knows that you're there for them.

Have a nose through some of these articles that have been written by young people in Cardiff about depression, they might help you understand what your friend is going through.

Finally, while we wait for other readers to leave some advice, please have a look at our info sections on depression and self-harm.



Commented 23 months ago - 16th June 2014 - 12:55pm

Depression isn't something that is fixed easily, it takes time and a lot of understanding, there's a good video about a big black dog which explains it really well.

But yeah make sure your friend knows you're there to help and don't put any pressure on them but really try to get them to stop self-harming, it's a dangerous thing to do.

Sam Sprout (Editor)

Sam Sprout (Editor)

Commented 23 months ago - 16th June 2014 - 13:05pm

Think this is the video, it's a good one I know anyway.

As mentioned above, you can contact Meic directly if you want some one-to-one advice, their service is free and you can do it over phone (080880 23456), by text (84001) and by instant messenger - http://meiccymru.org/.

Other organisations that might be useful include Journeys, Cardiff Mind and the Amber Project.

Hope this helps.

Tom W

Commented 23 months ago - 17th June 2014 - 18:39pm

Thank you for sharing this. I hope some of the following will help your friend and you. It is likely that you will need support through this issue, too, and please do not feel guilty or afraid to admit it - we're only human :)

If your friend sees her local GP, they will be able to direct her to the best help. Lots of people have sought help this way. This is also important because she’ll be “on the radar”, so the experts will know to look out for her. Incidentally, it will all be confidential, so she doesn’t need to fear people ever “using it against” her.

About a year ago - because so many people now come forward about their mental health - a brilliant thing was set up, called the Cardiff and Vale Primary Mental Health Support Service (PMHSS). It allows people to speak to an expert within 28 days. Her GP can refer her. It’s the quickest way to long-term help. Link: http://www.cardiffandvaleuhb.wales.nhs.uk/primary-mental-health-support-service

However, the PMHSS isn’t designed for the most urgent cases. Indeed, for such cases, 28 days is a long time. There are other services for these cases, however, like the national helplines. She should still see her GP though, if she can, to get on the radar and to get the ball rolling. I’m no expert, but I can think of Meic and Childline as good helplines to start. Hopefully other people can clarify/expand this. Such support can “catch” you when you fall. The role of the PMHSS is to keep you standing for longer.

The PMHSS run free, very well put-together courses that anyone can go on. I can vouch; they can be life-changing. Here’s more on their courses: http://www.cardiffandvaleuhb.wales.nhs.uk/pmhss-courses. Here’s a list of current courses, run locally by very friendly trained professionals: http://www.cardiffandvaleuhb.wales.nhs.uk/opendoc/229642. I’d recommend that you take a look for yourself, too. They can help with stress, anxiety, panic, depression, OCD, intrusive thoughts, etc.

Finally, I wrote a Sprout article that involves some of the ideas that might come up if you or her go on a course. It can be applied to stress, depression, etc, too. Any questions, let me know. Here it is: http://www.thesprout.co.uk/en/news/one-in-five--of-the-time/15350.html

I’d really love it if others were to write similar articles about how they’ve coped with and/or experienced such issues, so we can continue to learn from and support each other. One thing I learnt from mine is that you never know who’s going to stumble across it and be grateful.

Hope this helps a bit,

Tom x



Commented 23 months ago - 19th June 2014 - 14:28pm


Thank you for sharing this with us. Sounds like you really care about this person and want to help get them out of depression and help them with their self-harm.

Seems like she has told you about what is going on for her and it is great she has you to talk to about it and be there for her, but sounds like she does not want to tell everyone in your group and wants people to think she is happy. Sometimes it can take people time to ask or tell people that they want help.

However, being there and supporting people who need help can be really tough and getting support for yourself can help you help them. Talking about what’s happening for you and having a look at information on depression and self-harm will able you to be there for them when they need it.

There are some services that support both people who self-harm and those supporting them – selfharm.co.uk/about/contact_us has an email service where you can ask question and talk to staff about self-harm, and TESS support women up to the age of 25 by text message on 0780 047 2908 or by email them at www.selfinjurysupport.org.uk/tess-text-and-email-support-service

If you want to talk and have a look at your options, Meic is here 24 hours a day by phone 080880 23456, text 84001 or instant message at http://meiccymru.org/

I hope this helps and this person gets the help she needs

Take care




Commented 23 months ago - 27th June 2014 - 09:16am

Thank-you aunty sprout

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